Our Science Correspondent, Jurgen MacGlashan, has written to the authorities to suggest that ‘sex pheromone traps’ be placed in the toilets of food serving areas in airports, ferry terminals and roadside services, in an effort to keep out the new variants of Covid which the PM has warned will soon be washing up on our shores.
This would be a replication of the currently successful traps keeping Halyomorpha halys, the Stink Bug, out of Scotland.
From The Scottish Farmer yesterday:
The stink bug can already be found on every continent in the Northern Hemisphere, including North America and mainland Europe, and has a wide host range including soft and tree fruit, field vegetables, and ornamentals. Scientists from the James Hutton Institute, Scotland’s Rural College and SASA have placed sex pheromone traps at strategic points around Scotland, including near transport hubs and in soft fruit growing areas, to attract the bug if it is present, and developed a DNA fingerprinting method to help distinguish it from similar, less damaging species.
Jurgen tells us that his proposed trap would include an aerosol sensor placed under toilet seats and using an accelerated version of the PCI test, detect Covid infection. A positive result would trigger a connected infra-red device to lock toilet area doors and trigger a flashing alarm. Dedicated security staff in full protective gear would then drive the infected individuals back across the border and dump them on verge.
Jurgen’s first idea of summarily executing the infected has now been abandoned.