application to work under Janey at Save the Union Unit

Inspired by Janey Godley’s application to lead the troubled ‘Save the Union’ unit, I’ve reworked my earlier application to Dom Cumming and offer myself as her second-in-command.

Dear Boris

Save the Union Unit

I write to offer myself as a key player in your creative destruction strategy for the UK.

In particular, I can advise on how best to make sure England’s destiny as a free and potent global force and, of course, a Borisian hegemony, is realised by first shedding the constraining and stifling forces of the BBC, Scottish social democratic politicians and voters. The BBC is demonstrably a force for centrist, post-Blairite politics propagandising daily to undermine more radical visions such as yours.

My own expertise in exposing BBC bias in Scotland will be useful in exposing similar biases which I can see, without needing empirical study, has been in favour of ‘moderate’ figures such as Swinson, Starmer and Subry. With regard to Scotland, it is clear that your longer-term electoral dominance of a new and exciting England, trading freely with the USA, India, Russia, Africa and the former empire, will be most effectively delivered by dumping Scotland. I can advise how you and your admittedly limited forces in Scotland might best drive Scottish voters into the SNP’s arms. Boris is already familiar with Ross Thomson’s charms and potential in that regard.

I can provide a full cv, on request, but I was formerly Professor of Media Politics at the Bobby Russell Group, University of the West of Scotland and, in 2014, and was reported by the BBC for bringing it and my employer into disrepute after publishing research proving BBC bias against the Yes Movement.

I look forward to your reply,

Naemeritus Professor John W Robertson, PhD, PGCE, MEd, Dip Ed Comp, Dip Ed Tech, PGC Media Education……

7 thoughts on “application to work under Janey at Save the Union Unit

  1. And also may apply for another post within Save the Union Unit
    And such is of a vital nature as no doubt the unit shall produce in colossal volumes of the material i wish to attend to and this
    Clean the S**t out of their cuckoo clock

    Like

  2. Alas John–you have no chance.

    You should have addressed the envelope/application to the BOSS.

    Dear Carrie,
    “Save the Union and endangered Rhinos/Big Cats Unit”.

    Like Boris, I abase myself before your wondrousness……………………………….

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Nah, you won’t get the job, your application is too clever for the likes of Johnson and his cabal, the applicant would have to be easily malleable! Good try though. ‘Save the union’ = STU, oh noooo!!!! Or, should it not be, ‘save the Uk’ STUK.

    Liked by 2 people

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