I know! I know! It was in Jason’s mum’s bedroom so it wuz!

Our wee debating society members are buzzin’ so they are, about Coronavirus in the school, at the school and among pupils.

School Heidie, Mrs Sturgeon, keeps correcting them:

Douglas, Richard, Ruth! Ssssssh! Look at me. Listen. Write down what I’m saying.

These are part of community clusters which have had an impact ON schools, rather than school-based clusters. The virus has NOT been transmitted within schools.

Richard! What did I say? Repeat it. Stop nodding like that. You’ll get stuck that way. Ruth! Stop pulling that face at me.

Right, now, go back to your seats and write at least 500 words on how you think the virus got round the scheme. No, I don’t want to know what you found in Jason’s mum’s drawers.

Where’s Willie? Is he off again today?

16 thoughts on “I know! I know! It was in Jason’s mum’s bedroom so it wuz!”

  1. Do not under any circumstances instruct them to write 500 words
    Instead tell them to walk South for 500 miles and as they do so stitch a dunce cap
    Upon their thick cranium

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Post Script
      Wee Willie is not missing at all.He
      still stands in the corner adorning a Dunce cap
      Make sure he also receives the long walk
      Order
      Forward Quick March South
      And the cap shall be most fitting for Ruth
      As it will go particularly well with a Ermine Robe

      Like

    1. Scott
      And when it comes upon Indy. with matters pertaining to such debt settlement and our share
      Kindly remind them of
      1.Tis the Bank of England who own such debt
      2. Show us any legal signature on behalf of the Scots responsibility for such debt incurred
      3.Despite 2 above we are willing to reach a fair and reasonable agreement as to our respinsibilty
      4.If we find and consider that such proportion is excessive
      Then issue the Invoice for such and upon receipt of such we shall return it with a demand for a credit note ( normal business practice) for the misappropriation of revenues derived from 46 Billion barrels of oil
      Then we shall reciprocate by issuing a appropriate Invoice to You for such monies
      Now can we begin the negotiations with
      That in mind with our intent to fairly pay our share

      Like

      1. ‘Tis the Bank of England who own the debt ‘

        The BOE is a National asset and as such I have no doubt will become a major haggling point regards asset transfer. Technically if part ownership of BOE was transfered to Scotland, Scotland would then hold part of England’s debt as an asset. What’s not to like ? It won’t happen of course because it would provide Scotland leverage over ruk monetary policy, its more likely then that we will agree a financial settlement leaving the debt with RUK.

        Like

    2. Fake news about the national debt to justify the next round of austerity. If you buy back your own debt with money you have printed, then as you cannot owe yourself money, the real level of debt falls to around 1.4b gdp.
      All of Covid measures paid for by printing money so no increase in national debt.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Ah
        Ok but what monies pay for the massive trade deficit England has
        Mercedes BMW Apple etc
        Do not accept monopoly print runs as payment

        Like

      1. Most excellent
        Just have to screen as a party political broadcast at next Indy ref
        Easy to raise funds to do so
        Prime time twice a day on all channels

        Like

  2. Life in the Better Together classroom. Mistress M. Gove as teacher.

    “Miss, miss, Dickies pu’in’ ma pigtails”

    “Stop that Richard, you know Ruthie is my Favourite”.

    “That Dug telt me tae dae it, Miss That. Dugs a richt bad yin–that’s whit ma maw says onywiys.

    “Stop it Richard. Nae clipin’ in my class”! “I waarm yer erse fur ye, if ye keep it up”!

    “Oah, Miss. Thats no fair. Noo Dug an’ Ruth are laughin’ et mi, and that wee Wullie the Creep keeps smirkin’ roon ‘is book”. (“A’ll “smirk” ye efter, ya wee bochle, nae teacher tae save ye then”!)

    Like

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