Imagine the headlines if six English towns were put back into lock-down ‘after’ failed infection control in a Glasgow hospital?

(c) The Tusker 2020: THIS IS A SPOOF!

Our spoof above. The actual headline was:

Coronavirus: Five-mile restriction kept around border cluster

Way down the page in the BBC report yesterday:

Scotland’s clinical director Prof Jason Leitch added: “The initial first case that we were aware of is a health worker from the Carlisle hospital and that may be connected to an outbreak at that hospital, but we can’t be sure yet.

In the briefing yesterday, Leitch reflected on the probability that a failure to follow proper infection control procedures tended to be the explanation for small outbreaks like this one.

Imagine that was a Glasgow hospital?

STV mention the hospital, but only hear the end, and have this:

Travel rules remain in cross-border areas hit by virus cluster

Here’s how the Herald headlined the story:

Coronavirus: Dumfries and Galloway residents caught in cross-border Covid outbreak told ‘don’t travel to pubs in England’

They mention the Carlisle hospital, again well down the page and after two Scottish factories. The Scottish Sun does not mention the Carlisle hospital at all and goes for:

Coronavirus Scotland: Scots PPE factory workers being tested for Covid after cluster of cases in Dumfries and Galloway

The Express, likewise, does not mention the hospital and has:

Twitter erupts as Sturgeon ‘BANS’ Scots from England with border counties under lockdown

8 thoughts on “Imagine the headlines if six English towns were put back into lock-down ‘after’ failed infection control in a Glasgow hospital?”

    1. Oh there shall always be a England (excuse the pun)
      But one can but only wonder what actually becomes of it when Scotland departs from the Union
      Me thinks it can only sink into the swamp that is of its own making
      And in this instance The Great Donald
      Shall not Drain The Swamp
      But pump more Scat into it
      Oh Land of Despair and Disease
      Bereft of all hope
      And a terrible past so called Glory

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      1. No, no.—— God is an Englishman, we are led to believe.

        His chosen people will thrive, when we are self governing.
        There will be warm beer, cycling vicars, cricket on the village green, May-poles (though not any Polish Poles), Morris dancing and sundry other wondrous things. The North will love the Southerners. There will be Anglo-French and Anglo-German Appreciation Societies ( AAS).
        All will be well.
        King Boris–Grease-Mogg et al.

        Scots will gaze at our neighbours “ower the dyke”, with fondness and love!

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        1. Well then in that case of God being a English man
          If any ever any make it to this imaginary place
          Then we in for one helluva fright who inhabits there and for all their evil deeds
          But let us introduce a little humour
          God is busy making heaven and earth
          And task almost complete as he comes to the west of Europe to finish the job
          He is busy creating Scotland whilst in the middle of
          There are shouts of discontent from the recently completed German,Italians etc.
          God roars Silence
          And asks of them what is wrong
          They reply in Unison that they consider that he is showing bias and favouritism with regards Scotland in comparison to themselves
          God replies
          Patience my dear children you have yet to see who the Next Door Neighbours shall be

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  3. The Britnats would beup at the border with pitchforks if a Scottish hospital had spread the virus into England, they really would, and they would close the non existent border! How dare Scotland infect the English they’d say, and of course Nicola Sturgeon would be forced out of office.

    If you look at Met office weather, they do accept that there’s a border, or ‘borders’ or ‘southern Borders’ even, but they do call the UK a ‘country’.
    ‘Lothian and Berwickshire’ seem to be one and the same though. Interesting. Where is ‘Berwickshire’? Is it a region, does it span the non existent ‘border’ or, ‘southern Borders’?

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