Scotland has been low on the list in terms of ordering things before and I would hope they get their bid in quickly for when the test is going to be available.

In a report requiring all the expertise of my granny – ‘If you don’t get doon tae that shop the noo, there’ll be nane left! – Prof P warns the Scottish Government they’ll need to be quick to get some of those new Roche anti-body tests and, in an unguarded moment, says the above.

He’s so right. Matt Hancock will have been on the phone to Swiss company Roche to tell them that England comes first for supplies and to tell the hated Jocks to ‘get tae’ or whatever he would say. Remember this:

In case you think I’m exaggerating on the ‘hated’ bit, see:

The Roche HQ in the UK is in Welwyn Garden City but they have a manufacturing plant in Ayrshire. The town of Dalry has even named one of the streets after them – Roche Way – so maybe we can call in a few favours? North Ayrshire Council has surely funded a few golf outings for the senior Swiss lads?

Update from reader Capella at 13:17: The Roche test was developed by scientists in Edinburgh. BBC leaves out that important piece of information. But this interview with Roche CEO states quite clearly who developed it.

Leading campaigner for ‘No’ in 2014 and since, ‘leading expert’ (in 20th Century Corned-beef sandwich bugs?) and apparently still ‘from the University of Aberdeen’, Professor of not-virology, Hugh Pennington (82) makes more appearances on Scotland’s MSM than anybody still working in the field of virology such as:

Professor David BhellaProgramme Leader (Centre for Virus Research) University of Glasgow and handy for the Herald offices and Pacific Quay

Professor Paul DigardChair of VirologyReplication and pathogenesis of influenza viruses. University of Edinburgh

Professor Manfred Weidmann Professor of Virology University of Stirling, Stirling, FK9 4LA

So, lets get those tests! Come on Nicola, wake-up!

I almost repeated Sam Gompels’ advice there but then I remembered former SNP MSP Mark MacDonald’s tweet on digits.